Hard Teaching 10 Sorry Mum, you can't come

Why did Jesus tell his followers to leave their families behind to follow him?
There are a couple of occasions where Jesus says things that sound very hard to our ears. Like this one:
Jesus called a man to follow him, and he said he would, but just needed to bury his father. Jesus replied, "Let the dead bury their own dead." Another one said," I will follow, I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say goodbye to my family.” Jesus replied, “No one who puts a hand to the plough and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.” (Luke 9:59-62)
Harsh? It sounds like it.
Then there as the time when Jesus was in a house teaching a crowd of people, and someone knocked at the door saying, "Your mother and brothers are out here, asking for you." Jesus' response was to say "here are my mother, father and brothers, right here in the room with me." (Matthew 12:46-50)

What to make of this?
Perhaps Jesus didn't want his followers to be tempted away from putting his priorities first. In the case of his own family, few of them believed in him during his lifetime, and they tried at least once to interfere in his mission. Perhaps he had to keep them at arms length, or they would have tried to prevent him doing what he needed to do.
His first retort to the man who was waiting for his Dad's funeral sounds especially bad, doesn't it? Let the dead bury their own dead? What kind of comment is that?
Well, probably not the kind of comment we think it is. "Let me bury my father" didn't actually mean, "he's dead and I'm waiting for the funeral." It usually meant, he's old, and I have to run the farm/family business/look after things at home until he dies, and then I'll be free to please myself. So it could be more of an excuse.
Jesus said that his presence wouldn't always be good for families. It would stir up division - some people would be for him, others against him. (Luke 12:51-54) It would be important for his followers to realise that becoming a disciples meant sacrifice. Better to be told that at the outset, than discover halfway through.

So maybe this is about counting the cost before you sign on the line. Maybe we want to have our cake and eat it too much, and sometimes being a Christian will mean some hard choices. Maybe it will.

But don't let anything I've said persuade you that it's OK to turn your back on your family. The fifth commandment still applies: "Honour your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you." (Exodus 20:12)

Honour them.

But don't let them be more important than God.